The pain was unbearable. The pain was in my stomach enveloping my entire body. I knew I could not drive so I got a friend to drive me to the local country hospital. My doctor, who had been falsely diagnosing me for months, took one look at me and arranged for an ambulance to take me to a lager hospital in Ballarat. It was acute Appendicitis,
now burst and slipped into the back of the spine, gangrene was taking place. Slightly different to being flem in the stomach as had been diagnosed for months and my truful diagnosis ignored. A patient should never tell a doctor what's wrong with him.
I was in the ambulance, an emergency nurse beside me, and we were rushing off to Ballarat, lights flashing. This is serious I thought. Not feeling good...things becoming blurred. Gawd, I'm about to die, I was thinking. Interesting, I thought, as the spirit was releasing itself from the body. I'm going into a coma. I went through the ceiling of the ambulance, just hovering outside above the roof. Ahhhh, I was fully relaxed and at peace. The damn pain was gone but I could still sense the uncomfortable state of the body. Like a numbness. We were passing my parents house...I could see them by the gate, with others, waiting for the ambulance to pass. They were notified of what was happening and they lived right on the highway to Ballarat. What a pleasant sight, I though, out on the roof, gorgeous blonde hair blowing in the wind. As we passed I waved at them...wish they could see me. I could sense and feel their emotion leaving them, love, sadness, grief and anxiety, directed to the ambulance, touching me. It felt good. I sent back strong love and reassurance.
I was in the ambulance, an emergency nurse beside me, and we were rushing off to Ballarat, lights flashing. This is serious I thought. Not feeling good...things becoming blurred. Gawd, I'm about to die, I was thinking. Interesting, I thought, as the spirit was releasing itself from the body. I'm going into a coma. I went through the ceiling of the ambulance, just hovering outside above the roof. Ahhhh, I was fully relaxed and at peace. The damn pain was gone but I could still sense the uncomfortable state of the body. Like a numbness. We were passing my parents house...I could see them by the gate, with others, waiting for the ambulance to pass. They were notified of what was happening and they lived right on the highway to Ballarat. What a pleasant sight, I though, out on the roof, gorgeous blonde hair blowing in the wind. As we passed I waved at them...wish they could see me. I could sense and feel their emotion leaving them, love, sadness, grief and anxiety, directed to the ambulance, touching me. It felt good. I sent back strong love and reassurance.
The ambulance was slowing down. We were pulling into the hospital. I was being hurriedly pulled out of the ambulance...sucking my spirit back into the body, being immediately overwhelmed by intense pain. There were hospital staff all around me. They were working on me...pulling clothes off, sticking needles into me...sticking tubes up my nose, throat and unmentionable places. There was a male nurse pumping questions at me which I tried to answer amidst the pain. I felt strong admiration for those gathered around me. I was in good hands. In the lift, up a long corridor...I was drifting away...beginning to lose consciousness and perspective. The last sight I had was a nurse in green theatre gowns, looking down at me...those eyes...so knowledgeable...locking with mine above her mouth guard. I know those eyes...I know you...I was gone.
I awoke in bed. Deep pain. I reached down to my stomach and thought...shit!...feeling the long scar covered in plastic sheet traversing up to my chest. They must have cut my whole stomach open. The days passed slowly...visitors came and went...but the pain endured. I was starving...beginning to hallucinate. Large hamburgers and sticks of salami were torturing me as the passed through my mind. I tried to reach out in vain. I even asked my father to see if he could sneak in a stick of hot salami. I was not allowed food or drink. I've gone to hell, I thought. Demons disguised as hamburgers...taunting me.
One day a demon, disguised as my mother, brought me in a block of chocolates, knowing damn well I wasn't allowed to eat it. It must have been an evil spirit as I'm sure my mother has more brains than that. But I could be mistaken. That same day, while lying in bed twiddling my thumbs in boredom, along with the other seven ward residents, I noticed a female enter the ward. Immediately I felt my caveman instincts come to the surface, thinking, hmmmm, aren't you something? She was beautiful. I had a feeling she was a nurse but certainly wasn't dressed like one. I got a bit of a shock when she ignored the other beds and came directly to me. She sat down on the bed beside me. She placed her hand on my brow and said softly: "I am glad you made it. Especially you."
Now here I was lying, half dead, tubes stuck up my nose and throat, probably looking quite revolting and, her touch on my brow and the few words that she said through me into a shock and puzzlement. Why would she say this? I was just a patient. I can understand were a nurse to say, "I'm glad you made it," that can be considered natural but, "especially you," creates a mystery of personal knowing. I was dumbfounded and didn't know what to say so, feeling slightly embarrassed, I offered her a piece of chocolate, when I should have asked her for a date, I suppose. She answered, "No thank you. I must go." she got up and walked out the ward. For the 4 weeks I was in hospital I never saw her again. Believe me, I was so hoping that I would.
Unless anyone can give me a better explanation - I believe it was a visitation.
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